the RED life

Waiting

2010-12-03T20:43:00.003-05:00

Advent is the season which we wait for the coming Christ child. We wait with anticipation for the fulfilment of hope. Each Sunday we light just one more candle, never all of them, and it doesn't look quite right to our eyes. We want it to be finished and complete all at once. The one candle looks too lonely, two lacks balance, and three is almost right but not quite. But on Christmas Eve, all is made complete. God says, "When the days were completed..."

I eagerly anticipate decorating for Christmas. I plan crafty things I want to do, what theme I want and where everything will go. For me, everything needs to go a certain way for "the mood" Christmas to feel right and it starts with the tree and decorations going up Thanksgiving weekend. The six or seven weeks of twinkling light is the best part of the season for me. But this year it will be a little different.

School and studying for finals have taken all of Chad's time. Before he started studying he had one request- to decorate the tree and hang the lights outside. Which means it won't happen in my "perfect" timing but in all likelyhood when he is finished with finals, only one week before Christmas.

This was hard for me. In this time of living on a little, it's the little things that mean the most. And for me, Christmas means peace and rest that is not found the rest of the year. And as much as I hate to admit it, I find most of the peace and rest in the lighted tree and other things of Christmas.

While waiting for Christmas to "start" I'm finding myself focusing on Advent more than ever before. I am listening more attentively to the Advent readings about waiting for the Promise to be fulfilled. I am finding more meaning in Sarah's waiting for the son she was promised in her old age. I'm feeling a bit of the anticipation the Children of Israel felt while waiting for the Messiah's arrival. It's seems silly but in the absence of lights and a tree, I am feeling Christ more.

And it feel just right.

A little Fall decorating...

2010-11-27T13:27:00.004-05:00

...just in time for everyone else to put up their Christmas bling! I waited to pull out all the Fall decor until after Jordan was finished with boot camp since the mantle was for him. So despite the lateness of the pictures, the house was decorated for fall for the whole month of November. Honest!

Our mantle, was very simply decorated with some Indian Corn, warty gourds and candles. I was able to get the corn and gourds very inexpensively on the Manager's special rack at the grocery store. The two bags of corn and one bag of gourds (there were nine!) was...$3!!! Just my price.

The larger candles were a wedding gift from one of Chad's aunts. The gift card said "may your marriage have all of the heat-and none of the burn"! We still laugh about it!
I love traditional candles with flames but with a busy, little one who is into everything right now, this has been a great alternative. All of the heat-and none of the burn!
And speaking of little ones with busy hands- We found Bram chewing on this lovely. When we jumped up and down, trying to explain that it was yucky and not to eat, he signed "candy". We're not sure if it tastes like candy to him (it's a scented candle) or if he thought "candle" was "candy". Anyway, some serious teeth marks!
Everything in the house is baby-proofed but some areas need to be more proofed, if you know what I mean. This is one such area. Bram plays around , behind and under this table so the pumpkin is fake and the flowers are from a field. Nothing fancy, just fall-ish. And safe.
And last, the other corner in the room. The is one of the two pumpkins from our trip to the pumpkin patch, they lasted beautifully through the season. As I'm writing, they are roasting in the oven. Here we go Pumpkin Doughnut Muffins! My samovar is from Russia and it's one of my favorite things! I love how it just stands out and says "Hello! I'm not from here!".
So there it is, the little bit of fall decorating over here. This weekend, I'll start the Christmas decorating but I think it will go a little slower than previous years since Chad wants to help but is gearing up to having a very busy and full finals season.

With a thankful heart

2010-11-24T22:09:00.003-05:00

This Thanksgiving has been unexpectedly stressful for us. We're all still trying to get over our respective sicknesses, while Chad has been cranking out papers, with two more due the Tuesday and Wednesday after Thanksgiving weekend. This year, we had planned to gather with my family in Ohio for the holiday, but when the time came, there simply was no way for us to go, between money being tight, the mountain of papers and the weekend being too short. My sister and her husband drove up to my mother's from Nashville and I have a strong case of the "wish I was there's".

But despite all of this, I am so thankful. As the verse above says, the Lord has done great things for us and as a result, I am filled with joy. When you are able to recognize who the Giver of all good gifts is, your life is filled with peace and joy. The kind of joy that allows you to rest from the grasping at empty things and find contentment in your present circumstances. Which, of course, leads you right back to having a thankful heart. A beautiful circle.

So this holiday season I've been working on recognizing as many of the good gifts and "great things" the Lord has done for me. It's been slow and sweet. And my joy is waking back after what seemed like a very long slumber.

It is yet another gift which I am thankful for.

Sickness Abounding

2010-11-18T11:38:00.009-05:00

We almost never get sick, over here. Chad and I very rarely get any sickness involving vomiting, though every winter I get at least one or two of the upper-respiratory type sicknesses. But this one has hit us hard.

Monday night, we woke up to hear Bram miserably being sick in his room. His first ever, flu. The rest of the night was so sad. By morning, there was a mountain of laundry. He was sick all day, barely sleeping but only able if he was right next to me. But by evening he seemed much better and by Wednesday you'd never know he had been sick at all! Praise the Lord!

Last night, before we went to bed, Chad told me he wasn't feeling so great. I thought it probably was just the pizza not sitting right in his stomach. "He never gets sick" I thought. FAMOUS LAST WORDS.... He was so very sick, allllll night long. And even now, he's sleeping on the couch, shivering and fighting waves of sick feelings. Poor, sweet man.

So I guess this means I'll get it. At this rate it will be sometime over the weekend. Yuck, yuck, double yuck. But better now than over the holidays I say.

Hope you all are doing well and HEALTHY!!!!

Happy Hallowe'en

2010-11-01T12:50:00.010-05:00

This year marked our first "real" Hallowe'en. Last year, I had big plans to dress Bram up and show him off to all the cute kids that came Trick or Treating but whatya you know, that silly, little five month old baby couldn't even stay up for the festivities. And only one group of kids came to our door. I was very sad.

This year, however, he was big enough to participate AND stayed up the whole time! Way to go kiddo!

Since neither Chad nor my parents let us Trick or Treat, it was a whole new experience for us as well. We did not dress up (though next year I might try it!) and since we had been out of town for the better part of last week and weren't sure we'd make it back in time, we didn't have a plan for Abraham. SO we headed to the Dollar Store.

The first plan we came up with was to use a large teddy bear and turn it into "Max" from Where the Wild Things Are but when I started make the costume I realized that we had remembered wrong and Max was a wolf not a bear with a tail. (I know, silly thought. But in my defense, it has been over 10 years since I'd read the book!)

But while at the Dollar Store we passed by the costume section and Bram grabbed a fireman helmet and wore it the whole time! A huge first for him! So after Max fizzled we decided to do a fireman instead. With Duct Tape. The tutorial we used can be found here. But it wouldn't be that hard to do without one.

So here's the boy-- very excited for his first Trick or Treating!

Trying on the costume for size...

I just love this kid so much!

"Daddy, what's going on?"

Virginia Beach Fire Department's little hero...

All the kids we went Trick or Treating with. And yes, there's another fireman! They were a huge hit togther.

He got so tired of walking around that he sat down in the middle of the street!

The Loot! Chad was so surprised at how much candy Bram got. Suprised but enjoying it!

Of course now the reality sets in--we have to/get to eat all the candy now. A week of alternating sugar rush and crashes. And then trying to squeeze into my skinny jeans again. Blah.

Pumpkin Patch Kid

2010-10-21T09:16:00.019-05:00

Yesterday was the long awaited day at the Pumpkin Patch! We had so much fun with all the kids and discovering what a hayride was, what pumpkins are, and visiting the animals. The day itself was absolutely perfect. Here area few of the highlights:

Hello Goats!

Making friends with Mr. Scarecrow.

Come play with me little chicken!

He was a little confused as to what the pumpkins were. He would just walk around and sign "what is it?"

I tried so hard to get one of those adorable pictures with the cornstalks and pumpkins but he wouldn't look at me the whole time I was taking pictures!

This was the closest he came to looking and smiling all day. What a serious little guy!

This Week's Best

2010-10-09T07:14:00.009-05:00

(This is this week's best picture of Abraham. Love the turned in toes!)

So after compiling this post I've realized something has to change.

I've been wanting to do a link-y post on blog for some time, preferably on a regular basis. I wanted something I could look back on and find some of my favorite posts, from my favorite blogs at any time. But the time involved is WAY more than I'm able to commit to.

Like four hours too long.

I know it will get faster and I'll figure out all kinds of awesome tricks that will shorten the time involved but I know I don't even have the time for the learning curve. Plus, I think it's a bit overwhelming. Just a little bit.

So something is going to change. But I don't know what.

Anyhoo.... Super Fun Links!!!!!

Awesome craftiness-

Ana White/Knock off Wood- She does it again! Picture Ledges, Ladder Shelves and a High Chair, oh my!!!

Cluck, Cluck Sew- A cute chunky fabric watchband tutorial

Grosgain- Thrift Store Thursday and the cute pencil skirt.

How about Orange- Super cute Recycled Paper Flowers! I'll have to use this at Christmas...

Adventures in Dressmaking- How to take in a sweater

Yummy food-

A Year of Crockpotting- Oreo Cheesecake

(in the post she also has a link for Pumpkin Cheesecake in the crockpot. Imagine the thanks at Thanksgiving this year!)

Pioneer Woman- Corn Chowder with Chilis and Stuffed Shells. Need I say more?

Deliciously Organic- I probably won't make this organic but I could not resist Peanut Butter Bread Pudding.

Good Cheap Eats- I've been very lax on my salad intake lately. This looks like a good way to start back up! Orchard Chicken Salad.

Lick the Bowl Good- Mocha Frappe' Pie. Must. make. this.

Simple Bites- Whole wheat buttermilk rolls in a jar!

Bakerella- Can you imagine how fun it would be to go to Cupcake Camp?!

The Nourished Kitchen- I may have to try this: Triple Beet Salad.

Great thoughts-

Life as Mom- Frugal Fridays: Saving my Milk Money.

MADE- Celebrate YELLOW! A sweet mama story about popcorn.

Grocery Shrink- How to have the best pregnancy ever.

The Nester- Make man corner. Brilliant!

Passionate Homemaking- Let your work be your worship.

Simple Mom- What is simple living? Choosing your priorities.

Simple Organic- Staying healthy this winter by eating whole foods and using home remedies .

Small Notebook- The guy/T-shirt connection.

The Lettered Cottage- They've got a new look. Look!

V and Co.- Hello and Goodbye.

A Joke

2010-10-08T17:02:00.006-05:00

I know I've been out (as my mother says) "out of commish" for the last week but its been a really busy one and I've barely been on the internet much less been able to write anything. But I had to write this story, before I forget to, for posterity's sake.

What does this....

...have to do with this?

So this past Sunday, we got up a bit late, I had to rush through my shower and instead of blowing my hair dry (or not, as is usually the case) I put in a set of Japanese hair sticks and ran out the door. When we got to church, I went to take Bram out of the car and he started waving his arms and pointing at my head. I signed "what?" to him and asked what he was pointing at. He kept pointing at my head and finally he signed "bunny"!

We laughed and laughed! To him my hairsticks looked like bunny ears! It was his first joke. So cute.

It's back!

2010-10-05T11:08:00.009-05:00

It's that time of year again. The days are shorter, the nights are colder, our drinks are pumkpin-ier. Is that a real word? I don't know but in my house it is!

Anyway.... I love the Pumpkin Spice Mocha at Starbuck's. Yes, you heard me right. NOT the Latte' but the Mocha. It's like a decadent creamy pumpkin pie with a chocolate crust. Or Pumpkin Cheesecake with a chocolate espresso sauce drizzled over top. Or heaven in a cup, if you really want to know how I feel about it.

Sooo.... Starbuck's has the delicious, wonderful, nectar of the gods beverages for the very affordable price of...$6.00 a cup. WHAT!?!?!!!! (yes, it the Grande)

That is not in my budget, not even a little bit. So I've been scouring the internet for an alternative I can make at home. So far I've found a few delicious Latte's but still no pumpkin mochas. I guess I could put some chocolate in my homemade latte if I have to.

Here are a few of the yummy Latte' recipes I've found.

Made it in the blender for frothy goodness!
The Kitchn- DIY Pumpkin Spice Latte'

Make it with a homemade vanilla syrup!
Smith Bites- Starbuck's Pumpkin Spice Latte'

The best part of making your cup of loveliness at home? You can stay home a do this....

(did you notice, they're making a list of their dreams...hmmm...)

Ahh... who are we kidding. We'll actually be doing this...

Have a great day!

Happy Anniversary Babe!

2010-09-30T21:33:00.007-05:00

In our house, we celebrate many things and many "holidays". Today is one such day!

It's the 4th anniversary of the day Chad asked me to be his wife!!!!
(this is not our wedding. It's another celebration!)

It was a lovely day, full of unexpected surprises (I knew it was going to happen, so there were many other weird surprises instead!)and interrupting foreign tourists.

When it actually happened, it was so funny and obvious what was going on that afterwards we realized he never actually said " will you marry me?" and I never said "yes"! Some how we communicated our intentions anyway and it was wonderful.

Sweetie, I'm so glad you asked me to share your life. There has never been a day or moment in the past four years that I've regretted it or even wondered if I made the right choice. The only thing I've wondered was what it would have been like to marry you sooner! I love everything about you including (but not limited to)- your curly hair, attached ear lobes, and brown eyes. Without you I would never have learned so many things about the world of science, history, the Navy and love.
(this is Chad with Nicola Tesla)

I love you wonderful, handsome, hubby! Here's to our forever!

Grocery Shopping and Menu Planning for Dummies (Like me!) Pt.1

2010-09-30T13:02:00.007-05:00

So being a competitive grocery shopper is a big deal on the Internet, if you haven't noticed. It seems like every where I turn is some new way to cut your grocery bill by "(enter obscene number of $$$)". But most of the help found on the front page of Yahoo isn't really helpful to the family who's trying to REALLY cut their grocery bills. People who are not doing it because its a fun hobby in a time of economic crisis but because they have no other option in their current financial situation.

So I headed over to the blogging world.

There are thousand upon thousands of blogs out there advocating extreme couponing, playing the "drugstore game", and becoming an tightwad of Olympic proportions. Not that there's anything wrong with those money saving measures but...they're not for me. Especially, if I need to practice them on a longer term basis, like the duration of Law School.

If you are at all inclined to research those methods of saving money, you need to consider a few things first-

1) What is your personality?
Are you very competitive? Are you motivated by a feeling of victory when you get a deal others might feel guilty about getting? (I'm not saying you are doing something wrong but some people feel guilty for various reasons in that situation. I am one of them.) Do you like the idea of cooking more than scouting for coupons? Are you a homebody? Are you easily overwhelmed or confused? Does the grocery store stress you out?

2) What is your Husband's personality?
Does he think this would be a huge waste of your time? Even after showing him how great the deals are? Does he disagree with stockpiling items you might not need in order to get a deal you do need? Does he like home cooked food or convenience foods? Is he willing to join in a grab deals when you can't make it out? Is he willing to learn the ropes too?

3)What stage is your family in right now?
Can you afford the time to learn the ropes of competitive shopping? Can you afford the inevitable mistakes you will make? Do you have to much on your plate already, be it that you're in the toddler stage or the driving your teens all over creation stage? Do you live in the city/suburbs or in the country? Do you know how to cook or do use a lot of convenience foods? Will this be a short term adjustment or will you have to practice it long term? Do you a car available for you?

All these things are very important to consider when choosing how you will attack your grocery bill. After struggling with trying to be like those amazing extreme shoppers, I've finally made peace with where we are right now. And surprisingly, our target budget and bills are comparable to the extreme shoppers without the hassle!

So I'm going to try and explain in the next few weeks/posts how I do it. Hopefully, it will be helpful to you.

Red, White and Fall

2010-09-29T13:02:00.005-05:00

This autumn my fireplace mantle has taken a less than "fall-ish" feel. But I'm okay with that.
This summer I decorated my mantle for the 4th of July and not long after that my oldest, younger brother (does that make any sense? For some reason it does to me!) finally fullfilled a dream to join the Army and left for bootcamp. I decided to leave it up for him until he came back.

How amazing is it that there are still young men who dream of serving their country by voluntarily joining during a time of war. I'm so proud of my kid brother.

The mantle has been the perfect reminder of the sacrifice many families are making this fall so we can have the freedom to celebrate the upcoming holidays in our own homes.

Lord of the Rings has nothing to do with 4th of July, BootCamp or the American Flag. My brother Jordan is a big geek and loves it sooo much. He'd read the books and play LOTR Risk all day if we let him. (We don't. We avoid it at all cost) It reminds me of him so much.

I love you kid brother! Thank you for making such a sacrifice for all the people you know and all those you don't know by defending your country. I can't wait to see you at Graduation!

I've linked up to The Nester's Mantle Party. Check out the other great ladies linked up there too! Later this week I should have all my other Fall decorating done so come back and see me then!

Rainy Day Blues

2010-09-28T09:30:00.010-05:00

(Rain, rain go away...Little Bram and I want to play!)

Why is it that as soon as you decide you're going to make a change for the better, something gets in your way?

I told myself that this year I was going to build the discipline of exercise in my life. I decided walking would be the easiest and most consistent way to accomplish with a very active tiny toddler. I even bought a stroller because Bram was getting too heavy for the slings. But after a couple of weeks of doing pretty good...rain, rain, and more rain! I forgot how rainy the fall is!

So I guess it's back to squeezing in a Yoga video! Wish me luck in attempting Downward Dog with a helpful partner...

P.S. The clouds parted this afternoon and we were able to squeeze in a walk! Yipee!

Why Blog?

2010-09-27T11:37:00.001-05:00

Or more accurately- why should I blog?

When I started blogging, I really didn't know why I was doing it. Worse still, I didn't know what direction I wanted the blog to go. I though it would just fall together and produce lots of readers (!) and lots of money (!!!). Dream on!

What happened instead was a mis-mash of posts that didn't connect and didn't reflect me as person. I was trying to be a copy cat of other successful blogs but without taking into consideration who I was and more importantly, what stage of life I was in.

After Christmas last year, I took a break and got a glimpse of what might be off. My other blog Use What You Have, was an attempt to remedy the situation. But by then my life had changed and I wasn't able to keep up with regular posts. My baby was older and needing more of my time. My hubby was going though a rough patch at school. I was barely able to get dinner on the table, besides trying to make freezer meals, and blog about it. It was a hard place. It was very discouraging.

By the summer I had (mostly) made peace with not regularly blogging. It was an increadibly busy summer. Lots of visits and visitors. Quite a few stressful situations that needed to be resolved. My husband worked at an internship. By the time I felt like I was able to breathe again, it was time to start school.

A couple weeks ago, Pioneer Woman wrote a list of what she's learned about blogging that resonated with me, especially #1- "Be Your self. Write in your voice. Write as if you're talking to your sister."

That's what I wanted to do but frankly was too nervous to do it. You see, I'm actually a very private person in real life. If you were to meet me, I'm pretty shy and don't like to talk about myself. I like to hide at home and watch movies, cook lots of dessert, drink coffee and hang with my husband.

So what on earth am I doing blogging?!

I ask myself that all the time.

I've come to the conclusion that what I really want for this blog is to be a record of the victories and special moments that we have while going through "the three most difficult years of your life". I want it to be a kind of scrapbook of what I've learned from all the wonderful, talented women in the bloggingsphere. I really want to "bless the Lord with my efforts". I want to be authentic here.

So I'm going to be doing things a bit differently. On the surface it might not look terribly different but the motivation and attitude are and in the end that's all that matters.

P.S. Another great article on the "how" and "why" of blogging was posted on Simple Mom. Check it out!

Megan Neilson Rocks!

2010-06-08T12:39:00.001-05:00

There are just some sewing bloggers that seem to have endless creativity and an eye for beauty that one can only aspire to. Meg Neilson is one of those bloggers.
Since discovering her on Wardrobe Re-Fashion, I have been inspired and amazed every time I visit her blog. Originally hailing from Australia, she has moved to Iowa (IOWA!!!) and brought her know how and ingenuity with her to the good ole' USA.

Her designs clearly show she believes a woman should feel as beautiful as she dreamed she would be, when playing dress up as a little girl. All her designs are ultra feminine and sweet as pie but yet comfortable enough to wear when chasing children. She proves this by wearing many of her own designs daily- and almost always in heels!

The other day I was bemoaning (yet again) the dearth of cute, modern nursing dresses. I am sooo tired of wearing separates only! I want to wear sundresses and maxi dresses, like everyone else, and still be able to nurse in them, without breaking the bank. Is that too much to ask? Apparently it is.

I thought for sure, I'd have to design something myself but Meg has come to the rescue!

She has designed an adorable dress that could be easily worn while pregnant, nursing, or anytime. It's just that cute! The pattern can be made as a top or dress, with three sleeve lengths- short, three-quarter or long. And because she loves all things pretty, there is even an optional ruffle for the hem! So awesome! I couldn't have come up with something this great if I had tried.

So check out Meg's blog and sign up for the giveaway today.

All pictures are from Meg Nielson's blog, and are of Meg herself! They were taken by her. I claim no credit for anything.

What kind of mama are you?

2010-02-17T15:06:00.001-05:00

I just finished taking the Mothering Styles personality quiz. Not surprisingly, I was an INTP (Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Perceiving) or as they described it "The Love of Learning" mother.

Its always surprising to me how close these tests come to describing me and this test was no different. The results describe me exactly as a mother, even a brand, spankin' new mama!

So what does a "Love of Learning" mama look like? She:

* fills her house with books and directs her children towards them for answers.
* encourages her children to discover their world on their own terms and lets them build confidence by making their own mistakes and discovering their own solutions.
* enjoys watching her children grow into emotionally intelligent persons and learns as much from them as she tries to impart to them.
* does not handle the craziness and confusion that frequently comes with family life very well.
* frequently struggles to maintain a routine or build the consistent structure needed in a family life.
* loses herself in her own INTP needs and worries that she is distant or detached from her children.

The tips they gave for INTP mamas were spot on.
1) set aside regular times for "mind time' doing things you can lose yourself in, like, knitting, reading, thinking, etc. This time is NOT a luxury but instead a necessity. It's what recharges and INTP mama and enables her to give to her family.
2) Many INTP mamas need to get up earlier than their children, stay up later or use nap times for this necessary recharge time.
3) Most INTP mamas feel they are very different than traditional mothers so need to trust their instincts and simply enjoy the relationship they have with their child.

Wow! This is me to "T"! Many of these very things are struggles I've had recently and am trying to implement solutions for right now.

Take the quiz and let me know what you get!

Happy Valen-Birtha-Versary!!!!

2010-02-15T12:42:00.001-05:00

Today is my birthday. Yesterday was Valentine's Day, next week is my husband and my's 3rd anniversary. We call this busy time of year "Happy Valen-Birtha-Versary"!!! It's full of kisses, hugs, and a few sneaky tushy pinches.

Today my hubby went out of his way to make sure he gave me a nice day. Since Abraham woke up several times last night he skipped this...

and let me do this...

And then he bought me one of these:

And he made me one of these:

I think it's going to be a good day!

Love, Love, Love...

2010-01-21T10:43:00.002-05:00

We've been working on getting Bram to sleep through the night (or at least longer!) for the past few weeks. Last night, we put him to bed at his new official bedtime of 8pm and he fell asleep very well. But at 11, he was back awake and trying very hard to stay that way.

So I climbed into bed with him and tried to nurse him a bit, hoping he would fall back asleep soon. He did, and what happened next is one of those wonderful "mommy moments" you will never forget.

He was sleeping, snuggled next to me and he began to stir like he was dreaming. And then he reached up and signed "mama" several times! My heart melted! It was the sweetest thing I had ever seen. He was "talking" in his sleep!

It was especially wonderful for me because although I knew he knew the sign for mama, he never signs it around me, only with Chad when he wants me.

So wonderful!
(While I never see Abraham sign my name, I managed to get a picture of him signing "daddy")

Grocery shopping- my way.

2010-01-19T14:27:00.003-05:00

I wish I loved grocery shopping. I really do. I wish when I walked through the store I looked happy, relaxed and stress-free. Something like this:

Instead, it takes me days to complete a menu, scour the internet for the best possible deals, and assemble the shopping lists to the various stores. By the time I get to actually do the shopping I feel more like this:

(I love the eloquence of Fry!)

I guess I just wish there was a better system. One that involved unlimited cash and home delivery. But until that magical day comes, I'll have to keep doing it the best I can.

Practice makes it possible

2010-01-19T11:51:00.001-05:00

Oh dear.

My very first post after making my "resolutions" is about how I'm not doing as good as I hoped. I was afraid this was going to happen.

BUT... then again I'm a frustrated perfectionist so I shouldn't be surprised. This is why I evaluated and picked the resolutions that I did. So when the inevitable happened and I became sidetracked, I could look at them honestly to see if they were the right ones to start with.

When I started to beat myself up for not following through (again!), this time I tried to re-evaluate instead. Did I need to do something different? Did I need to look even further out of the box to accomplish my goals? Did I need to break the goals down even smaller? And instead of just feeling angry with myself, I came up with a couple of do-able solutions.

1) The places I scattered my devotionals are not necessarily in plain view so I'm going to make little reminder signs to help me out.
2) Even though I haven't posted twice or even once a week, I HAVE done a lot of behind the scenes work on it, finished up some old posts, and worked a lot on my other blog.
3) And housework- the bane of my existence! I've haven't followed all of the reminders the FlyLady send me but I have shined my sink most nights and I'm learning how to make better use of my time through using my timer!

As I was thinking about all this, I realized anew the problem with New Year's resolutions- you fail before you even begin by expecting perfection just by making the resolution. I've done this to myself so many times before. Attempts at piano lessons come to mind. But we really don't work that way. We need time and lots and LOTS of practice.

I also have to remind myself that the goal was to get better at all of this by next year, not be perfect next week. (It begs to ask the question if it really was the goal, if I'm frustrated already!)
So I'm going to give it a go again with more patience and permission to take time to build these habits in my life. I'll also keep you updated how I'm doing.

Here's to making our Timer our Friend in 2010!

New Year's resolutions

2010-01-06T11:20:00.001-05:00

True Confessions: I've never been much of a New Year's person. It really doesn't seem like a holiday or even a special day to me. Most years, after all the fun of Christmas, I forget it's even coming up, so I guess it goes without saying-I'm not much of a New Year's resolutions kinda gal either.

Making big resolutions and proclamations of grand goals at New Year's seem to go against human nature so when challenged by reality they end up discouraging and depressing us instead of spurring on to greater heights. And combined with making them at the darkest, snowiest/rainiest/cloudiest time of year, it seems like a recipe for disaster. It's no wonder by spring most resolutions are cast aside and forgotten.

But despite my opinions on New Year's, I went against my habits and made some resolutions this year.

There is something about having a baby that makes you live so in the moment that you lose sight of the greater world and your whole person. I was warned about this phenomenon while pregnant but now it's so real. I love my baby so much I am willing to drop everything for him and tend to his needs. But, when I am old, I want to look back on my life having achieved certain goals and being a certain kind of person. I want to learn to balance what's happening now with my whole life.

So in light of those two opposites I thought long and hard about what goals I wanted to achieve this year and balanced them against the reality of having a small child before making any commitments. I thought about what disciplines/life skills I would like to have deeply ingrained by next year and came up with a list. I though about what I would need to adjust or delete from my life to make each one work because as we all know, in a perfect world we can just keep adding more and more to our life but in the real world, by saying "yes" to something, we are saying "no" to something else. I looked at what I would need to buy or acquire to achieve the different goals. When whittled down, the end result surprised me.

My Resolutions:
1)Do a devotion everyday.
2)Write a post on my blog once or twice a week
3)Incorporate as many of the FlyLady habits as possible.

I also came up with two skills I want to became markedly better at by next year:
1)Become more proficient at knitting, specifically learn how to knit cables.
2)Learn how to bake artisan bread in my oven.

I was surprised that losing the last of the "baby weight" didn't make it on the list. I was also surprised that reading certain books or certain reading lists didn't make it either. What made it on my list answered "yes" to these questions

1) Do I have the means to make it happen right now?
2) Will I have the money to make this goal achievable through the whole year?
3) Is this goal small enough to work towards with a baby?
4) Is this goal large enough to change who I am?
5) Do I need think "out of the box" in order to achieve this goal?
6) Am I doing this for my personal growth or because I feel pressure from someone/something?

By trying to answer these questions honestly, especially the last one, I really feel I will be able accomplish my goals this year. Here are a few of the ways I plan trying to do this.

Morning devotions have always been a problem for me mainly because I'm not a morning person! And since my son is not sleeping through the night yet, it's unrealistic for me to try and be up before him to do a devotion. So I'm accomplishing my goal by putting all of my devotionals in various rooms of the house that way when I have few minutes, one of them is available.

For my blog writing goal I'm aiming towards 1-2 posts a week. Instead of setting up a schedule that may or may not work, I'm just trying to post more often. If I get out 2 in one day, I'm done. I get one done that week, I'm still accomplishing my goal.

And for the FlyLady, she sends out an email everyday of the tasks you should do. If get all of them done-Great! If I just get my sink shined by bedtime- also great.

Hopefully by doing this with a thoughtful, truthful approach, I will be able to accomplish so much more than I have in the past!

So here's to a great year!

(photo/comic strip- Bill Watterson)

Check out this Giveaway!

2009-11-19T11:42:00.001-05:00

Over at SimpleMom (one of my favorite blogs of all times!), Tsh is hosting a giveaway- and the prize is a $50.00 gift certificate to Lisa Leonard Designs!

Lisa's jewelry is just fabulous and I've been drooling over her stuff for sometime now. This Sweetheart Tree necklace is what I would buy if I won!

So go over and sign up. Good luck!

How NOT to do your laundry frugally

2009-11-05T16:29:00.001-05:00

I've been trying to find ways to cut as many unnecessary purchases from our budget. Normally, this means skipping the prepared foods and making stuff from home. Sometimes this means making something you wouldn't think of making, at home. Laundry soap is one of those things.

Yes, you read right- LAUNDRY SOAP. You can make it at home, in either liquid or powdered varieties, and there are even ways to make homemade stain removers too! I was very excited! So off to Harris Teeter I went and bought the necessary ingredients, Ivory soap, 20 Mule Team Borax and Arm and Hammer Washing Soda. The total cost was $12.00 and I estimated it should make enough to last us all year. What a savings!

I shredded the bar of soap, using my food processor (made for easy cleanup at the end ;)) and mixed the Borax and washing soda together with it. The next load, I threw in my scoop worth and voila! The clothes were not only clean but my hubby commented that they looked even cleaner!

Encouraged, I moved on to stain removers. Here I have to stop and profess my love for OxiClean. What amazing stuff it is! Since most of my stains are of the organic variety, it works wonders on them and gets the whole load cleans because of its very presence in the water. Am I nuts? No I just love the stuff. So when I found a recipe to make OxiClean at home, I was on top of the world!

I had all the needed ingredients on hand (water, baking soda, Borax and peroxide)so made it up in one of my old OxiClean bottles. It came together just the way the recipe said it would. A few days later my son put it to the test.

Dismal failure. The stuff was rock hard and wouldn't even come out of the bottle.

My sweetie pie husband gave me some explanation involving scientific reasons it had turned rock hard but I was in no mood to listen. I just wanted OxiClean. And to add insult to injury, after days of soaking the spraybottle, I had to throw it away.

So in conclusion, you CAN NOT make OxiClean. :(

P.S. I still make my laundry soap and it work beautifully. I encourage you to try it.

My Color Personality is...

2009-11-05T15:26:00.000-05:00

...Sun Kissed!

I confess- I'm surprised.

While I do like all the colors suggested, they seem too dark for me. But I guess if paired with lots of white or off white, I would like them all very much. Now that I think of it, a lot of these colors do show up in my home. So maybe it's the photo that's throwing me- it seems too dark and modern so not very friendly.

Take the quiz! It's fun and they ask you unexpected questions!

Art by MeganTheilman

things I've learned from wearing my baby

2009-10-20T12:00:00.001-05:00

I love wearing my baby. It's almost an addiction (I can quit anytime, really!). When I get out my sling, my son starts kicking his feet and squealing in delight, which gives me the biggest mommy high. Sometime I think he might love it as much as I do!

When I was still working, a lady came in to my store with her one week old baby snugly wrapped in this crazy, bright orange, stretchy, bedsheet, wrapped around her body*. I was absolutely fascinated. While pregnant, I knew I wanted to have baby carrier, for the occasional convenience factor, but I didn't know anything about the world of "babywearing". My first sling was a disaster. Purchased at a big box store, I thought all slings were alike. My tiny son soon let me know this was not the case.

A few weeks later, I borrowed a Baby Bjorn from a friend for an all day 4th of July event. It was awesome! I delayed giving it back for as long as I could. Unfortunately, I had to give it back right before our move, which only served to confirm how essential a carrier is.

A few weeks later, while unpacking, I unearthed a sling one of my best friends gave me at my baby shower. I noticed it was a brand I heard of through my midwifery practice's online discussion group. With a few YouTube lessons on how to use it under my belt, and a day hasn't gone by that I don't use it.

So here's what I've learned:

1) Babies are learning about their larger world while being worn.
My son is incredibly curious. He wants to be in the center of everything, looking, touching, tasting whatever he can get his hands on. This is not unusual for babies or particular to my son. But what strikes me as odd is how is often other people comment on it. Almost every time we go out, someone will say to me "What a smart baby- you can see he's really taking in his world" or something similar. Because he is completely integrated in my world, he is learning more about HIS world.

2)Babies are learning about emotions while being worn
Kids are amazingly intuitive. Body language is virtually their only way to communicate with the world. When my son is in his sling, he is constantly "checking in" to see how I am reacting to life. Because he's physically close to me for a large part of his day, he can tell if I am happy, sad, sick, or stressed by my body language. Since I am aware of this, I try very hard to make sure I demonstrate healthy way of dealing with all that life gives me.

3) Babies are learning about love while being worn
When I am wearing my son, I've noticed that I am far more loving and attentive to him. I talk to him constantly, we make eye contact, I'll scratch his back, or snuggle him in hug. He coos at me, scratches my "back" (really my arm since that's as far as he can reach!) and nuzzles his head down on my chest. The sling facilitates this so much better than when I have him in a bouncy seat or playing on the floor. He's also able to witness loving behavior between his daddy and I when in the sling and close to us. I pray that translates to a healthy marriage for him, in the future.

***One disclaimer though--I do not believe this means babies who are not worn are going to be deficient in giving or receiving love! There is much more to it than that! But in my very limited experience, it is easier for me to demonstrate healthy love while wearing a sling which as I said, I hope will allow him to have a healthy framework to start his life with.

* I later found out this was a Moby Wrap style carrier. I want one in the worst way!

Sweet Sabbath

2009-10-11T22:48:00.002-05:00

"Because Jesus lives forever, He has a permanent priesthood. Therefore He is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because He always lives to intercede for them." Hebrews 7:24-25

Hollywood lies! (a.k.a. things I already knew but need reminded of often)

2009-10-08T15:04:00.000-05:00

I'm pretty much like any other American women-- I wish/long/desire to be thinner but I pretend/ignore/pontificate it away. Oddly enough, I generally felt better about my figure while pregnant which, I guess, shouldn't surprise me since I took care of my body and ate consistently healthy for the first time in my life (no diet of tea and tortilla chips, like in college!) and it was finally doing exactly what it was designed to do.

What has surprised me more was the very relaxed attitude I had about my weight, post-partum. I felt so good after the birth, I automatically assumed I looked as good as I felt and generally, that was true. That made me more willing to look at my weight-loss needs prosaically. "It took 9 month to put on, it'll take 9 months to take it off." But lately that fabulous feeling has been going away and its been a big battle to get it back.

The other day I was standing in line at the grocery and saw yet another tabloid cover boasting how a Hollywood mom got her body back in six minutes by eating six calorie meals, six times a day, delivered right to her doorstep. And a black cloud of envy scurried right over me in six seconds flat. "Why does SHE look so good, so quickly and I have a shriveled, shrinking stomach? I'm breastfeeding and I'm probably only consuming 36 calories a day too, between diapers, baths, unpacking, and life in general!"

So later on, when trying to get myself out of this funk, I used one of my favorite methods to do so, which is to remind myself that Hollywood is in the business of "exaggerating" the truth. (BTW-This method rarely works when pictures are involved because as we all know a camera ADDS 10 pounds, not makes you look thinner.) But then this AMAZING thought occurred to me.

While we/I take them seriously and allow it to become personal, it's just business for all involved. Do the tabloids check in with the new mamas and ask them what they weigh, postpartum? Not likely. They take a guess, put it on the cover and sell, sell, sell. What if they got the number wrong and the girls weigh more or less than they published? Do you think the new hormonal mothers would call US Weekly and correct that mistake? I know I wouldn't! It's better for them business-wise if everyone thinks they are camera ready as soon as possible. The only people who probably know the real numbers have signed a confidentiality agreement because their business would suffer if they didn't.

Somehow this barely original thought struck a chord with me, why not approach it all like business? No one really knows what weight we are, so just let them take a guess, there's no need to correct them, it's better for your "business" of staying healthy mentally. Those who do know, should be close to you and have likely "signed" a confidentiality agreement, in the form of a trusted relationship, otherwise their "business"/relationship would suffer.

Since realizing this silly but admittedly helpful train of thought, I feel freer from my self-condemnation, which was the real problem anyway. Ready to approach it from a long term philosophy.

So here's to reaching my goal weight by Easter!

Frugal Weekend Fun!

2009-10-05T12:52:00.001-05:00

I LOVE the autumn. There just something about the shorter days and cooler nights that makes me want to be outside as much I can. But I also just want to enjoy the cooler temperatures by snuggling up in a fleecy blanket and taking a nap. This weekend I got to do both!

Other fun inexpensive things we did:

... I finally figured out how to make bread in my Bosch mixer! I'd tried twice before but couldn't get the water temp right. This weekend it worked and I celebrated by making 2 dozen Turkey and cheese sandwich rolls and 2 loaves of Stromboli! (In case you are wondering what sandwich rolls are, think cinnamon rolls but with turkey and cheese instead.) Both of these make wonderful cold lunches and should last us 2-3 weeks.

... my husband and I decided to take up a new hobby-- metal detecting! He already had a metal detector from before we were married (he was a ghost-town hunter!) so it cost us nothing to start. We had to pay $1 for parking on the beach but eventually we plan on finding beaches that cost nothing. It was super fun and relaxing to walk the beach after dark, just moonlight, waves and our little family!

... I made blueberry scones for breakfast but in the middle of making them, I found I had run out of milk. Should I run to the store or find a way to resolve this with what I had on hand? Aha! Yogurt! I put in one container of peach yogurt in place of 2/3 cup of milk and they were delish!

What fun things did you do this weekend?

Sweet Sabbath

2009-10-04T10:00:00.002-05:00

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead...
1 Peter 1:3

Sneaky ways to make your grocery budget go farther

2009-10-02T08:17:00.001-05:00

I confess- I'm not the savviest grocery shopper. When I still lived at home, my sister and I had jobs to help the family and the house to run smoother. My older sister's was the shopping and menus, mine was helping with the little kids. We both were pretty good at our jobs but in my case, they didn't overlap very often. In college I lived in apartments and cooked my own food, so I should have figured out how to shop but instead I lived like a bachelor and just bought easy favorites over and over again. So even though I was almost 30 when I got married, I still didn't know how to make a menu or plan a grocery list.

Our first months were not pretty. We ate out far too often AND had food going bad in our refrigerator. At the same time. I was so embarrassed.

Eventually I learned how to sit down with my cookbooks and cooking magazines and plan a menu. Later I learned how to STICK to that menu! When we decided to go to law school I scoured the internet to find ways to live on as little as possible while we had to use student loans. One of the ideas that showed up often was using coupons. I was so excited by the prospect of walking out of the store with a cart full of groceries I had got for free! But the more I looked for coupons for REAL food, the more I realized I was going to need a different plan.

So over the next few days/weeks/months/years, (however long this blog lasts!) I'm going to show how we make it on our food budget, from budgeting through planning and executing a big shop to our meal preparation.

Should be very fun!

Weekend Update

2009-09-28T09:04:00.001-05:00

This weekend I came down with a lovely cold. At first I thought it was just allergies, so I didn't stop loving on/kissing/snuggling the Baby Bug, but... when I woke up Saturday unable to breathe, I felt immediate remorse. So far he seems fine, some small symptoms, but nothing too bad. I'm just worried that if he does get sick we will have to pay out of pocket because the insurance company is taking their sweet time putting him on our policy. I have a love/hate relationship with insurance. They seem so out of tune with the real needs of the people who pay them but the alternative is SO much worse. Customer service that takes days, weeks, months or government "help" that take years? Anyway, I'll just hop off my little soap box....

So this weekend was fun. We....

.... made some money selling our moving boxes on Craigslist! Reduce, Reuse, Recycle!

.... had a cheap date at Sonic- we ordered off their Dollar Menu! I really like their Jr. Burgers. Just the right size for a woman trying to lose here "baby belly"!

....checked out a new grocery store called "Bottom Dollar Foods". It seems like it will be a great place for us to shave some $$$ off the grocery budget. Their prices are less than some other stores and they accept coupons. The produce was great, even better than some of the upscale stores in the area.The only drawback is that it's kind of far and not in the best area. I'll let you know how the deals pan out.

....made my own laundry detergent. So far it works better than the stuff from the store and much cheaper too!

....used RedBox for the first time!

So all in all a great weekend.

(Photo: Prevention Magazine Online)

Sweet Sabbath

2009-09-27T09:02:00.001-05:00

Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. Psalm 100:4

Menu for the next two weeks

2009-09-22T10:26:00.001-05:00

My desire is that I'll be able to plan my menu one month at a time and post it right around the time of my shopping trip. That didn't happen this month because I was still unpacking and setting up our new life here but everything is settling into a much better routine, so I have hope for the future!

Week One
Sunday: We ordered Little Caesars. Hmmm!Pizza! Pizza!
Monday: Baked potatoes with sour cream, bacon, and cheddar cheese
Tuesday: Chicken Tortilla Pie with salad
Wednesday: Beef Stew and homemade biscuits
Thursday: Pasta with cauliflower and breadcrumbs
Friday: BBQ Chicken with potato salad and corn on the cob
Saturday: Beef Stew and homemade biscuits

Week Two
Sunday: Pork Chops with Rice
Monday: Spinach Bacon Quiche and salad
Tuesday: Sauteed Sausage and Peppers with rice
Wednesday: Thirteen Bean Soup with homemade wheat bread
Thursday: Chicken Tortilla Pie with salad
Friday: Spaghetti Carbonara
Saturday: Black beans and corn over rice

Sweet Sabbath

2009-09-20T11:03:00.002-05:00

" Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him" Psalm 34:8

Finally Friday!

2009-09-18T13:16:00.001-05:00

This week has been a complete blur. It seemed like everyday I was asking my husband what day it was because I just couldn't stay on top of it in my mind. I'm so thankful that whenever we don't "get it right" we are given the next day/next week to start all over again fresh!

I'm really looking forward to this weekend because I might get some rest. The Baby Bug has been going though a growth spurt (again!) so he's not been sleeping through the night. But he's getting big enough that I could take a nap and he and his daddy could have some play time! I was able to get into the very messy office and clean it up so I feel pretty good about that room and won't be thinking about it guiltily while I'm doing nothing. Today I'm going to make some delicious Strawberry Banana muffins so I won't have make breakfast in the morning, just in case I get the chance to sleep in a bit.

This weekend I plan on
...watching some TV or something from Blockbuster Online
...finding my knitting so my hands have something to do!
... taking a nap! (Maybe I can convince my husband to take us to the beach and I can take my nap there!)

What do you usually do on a lazy weekend?

Thankful Thursdays

2009-09-17T22:12:00.001-05:00

I can't believe it has been an entire week since I last sat down and wrote. I will get better at this, I promise!

What I am especially thankful for today:

... that I am healthy and with relatively no work on my part!
... a wonderful home that I feel "at home" in
... grace when it is given.

What are you thankful for?

Thankful Thursdays

2009-09-10T20:31:00.001-05:00

You know what? Today I am thankful. Not that I'm not thankful on other days but I think on Thursdays I will try to be freer in expressing my thankfulness.

Today I am thankful:
...for a new friend.
...for the sounds of military jets reminding me of those who protect my country.
...for the sweet sounds of my husband telling my son a story as he put the Baby Bug to bed.

What are you thankful for?

Perfectionism- the enemy of productivity

2009-09-09T08:45:00.000-05:00

I try to keep my house pretty clean most of the time but sometimes perfectionism gets in the way. How could perfectionism possibly keep you from having a clean house? Shouldn't your house be cleaner if you're a perfectionist? Not at all.

Case in point- When we moved, we planned the boxes to go directly into the room they belonged to make our unpacking simple. But we had a few stragglers that didn't belong in specific rooms since they had come from storage. Thankfully we have a second bedroom to put them in, while going through them. This room filled up with the random stuff much quicker than I anticipated. In fact, it was so full we weren't able to close the door! So every morning I'd walk by this room and say "I can't live with all this junk! I HAVE to go through it and get rid of it all!" A good intention, right? Enter real life. I have a baby who very adorable-y asks for my attention, most minutes of the day. There are meals that have to be made. My charming husband has papers he needs me to read and cases to discuss. Needless to say, not a lot of work has gotten done on the room.

A few days ago I was thinking about my everyday household cleaning and realized I hadn't vacuumed in more than three weeks. And as I was thinking about the vacuuming, I found myself saying "I can't do that yet, I need to clean the guest room clean first". What?! I can't do basic maintenance until an out of the way upstairs room is clean and organized? Why?

Because perfectionism got in the way. I needed the perfect house that was in my head before I could maintain it. And I wanted it with the wave of a magic wand, not breaking it into bite size pieces that could be accomplished while my son is in bed.

I find myself often struggling with this problem. Whether it be losing the last few post pregnancy pounds, growing in the Lord, or maintaining a budget, perfectionism frequently gets in the way. I don't want to do the little things that maintain or move me slowly in the right direction. I don't want the kind of results that you can only see from hindsight. I want them NOW! I want them BIG! But life rarely works that way.

So after I vacuumed that day, I realized what a difference that one little thing made and like anything worth doing, we do it in hope.

Law School Widow?

2009-09-03T12:17:00.002-05:00

I doubt it.

My husband of almost three years started law school last week. Previously we had lived in the Washington DC metro area, where I was a stay at home wife and he worked for a successful non-profit. It was a lovely easy-going life for us full of eating out, taking trips and watching movies whenever we felt like it. We had a sweet little apartment with arched doorways and beautiful parquet wood floors. Our love for antiques and unique decor fit perfectly.

Most people in DC thought we were crazy for going to Law School (People are always confused when I refer to "us" going to law school. But I will continue to say "we"because this is most definitely a joint venture.) "Why leave your good job with security and go into thousands of dollars of debt to enter a profession that's over saturated anyway?" "Don't do it. It will ruin your finances" and worse "It will ruin your marriage" was the advice we heard all too often. "Why do we want to do this crazy thing?" we asked ourselves. Because my husband has a dream. And I also have a dream.

He dreams of becoming an honest, godly lawyer and offer his services to those who genuinely need them. His hero is Atticus Finch. My dream is to have a husband who loves what he does professionally. I believe a huge portion of your family's happiness depends on a husband/dad who loves what he does. My heroes are the millions of women who stand next to their husbands, with radiant smiles, and say "when everyone else doubted, I believed in you and I knew WE could do it".

So we packed up our little apartment, our even littler 10 week old baby and moved 200 miles to begin the Law School Adventure! We now live in a bigger apartment with hilarious faded Smurf blue siding. Instead of arched doorways and parquet floors we have and an "open" floor plan and construction grade carpeting. But I love it all. There are so many blessing already. And I'm so excited to see where God takes us.

I am confident we will not only survive law school but we will flourish during law school. It will take hard work, flexibility, and sacrificial love I'm sure but, by God's grace we will do it.

That's what this blog's about.